There will be no call from Reception this Valentine’s Day

To tell me that something has been delivered for me to collect.

No walk through the office avoiding eye contact, brushing away

Comments like “Something has come for you, Horace, I expect.”

No, grinning Lady at the desk holding a big Helium filled balloon

Of a gorilla, or a giraffe or some such thing with mandatory hearts

And Happy Valentine’s Day message in various colours including maroon.

I’d have given anything to pop them. “Anyone have any darts?”

Then the problem of getting them all into the lift without blocking the door.

Now the walk back to the Department, always the worst bit to endure

Looking like an idiot with huge helium balloons as I walked across the floor

Knowing everyone was looking and laughing, every year there were more.

At home I knew she would be sitting in her chair giggling at her bit of fun

And thinking how smart she had been and preparing to tease me all night!

Her chair is empty now, her jokes have stopped, no one comes when I call, Hun.

Would I want to be embarrassed like that that on Feb 14th? You’re too darn right!

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